As anybody who frequents Twitter and internet news sites doubtlessly knows by now, President Barack Obama’s former literary agency had circulated a biography about him with their promotional materials that listed the young, up-and-coming politician as having been born in Kenya and raised in Hawaii.  As I tend to shy away from politics on this blog, I’m not going to comment on the political implications of this little morsel;  however, as an author who has been through the meat grinder that is the publishing process a few times, I can tell you a couple of things about how a literary agency promotes its authors.

Agents are busy people, and will typically leave bio authorship to the actual author–after all, who knows you better than yourself?  The same goes for publishers.  They’ll ask you to write up something that the publicity department can use in press releases, and the same text will usually appear verbatim on the “About the Author” page that you see at the end of a book.  I suppose under certain circumstances that an agent might spice things up a bit by adding a few details here and there, but I’ve never experienced an instance where the draft text wasn’t sent my way for approval.  Authors, you see, tend to have very fragile egos (present company excluded, of course), and the last thing some assistant at a literary agency wants is a disgruntled writer raising holy hell because his middle name got misspelled.

In short, I don’t believe that there is any way that Obama didn’t know that his author bio stated that he was born in Kenya.  In fact, it’s highly likely that he wrote the whole thing himself.  Now, you can count me among those who firmly believe that the president was, in fact, born in Hawaii as his birth certificate indicates–indeed, there’s no plausible reason to believe otherwise.  However, it stretches credibility to say that such a huge mistake of fact could have been made without the agency or Obama himself noticing.

In other works, somebody is lying about how “born in Kenya” got stamped on his bio.

Full disclosure:  I was repped by Jane Dystel & Associates for a couple of years before my agent there left the literary business.

I’ve been watching AMC’s The Walking Dead since the very start, not so much because I’m a zombie fan but because I’ve always loved a good, scary story and there ain’t a whole lot of those on television these days.  I really dug the first season with its creepy, end of the world vibe and thought it ended with one hell of a bang.  Season two has left me a bit wanting, though–well, let’s just be honest and say that it’s been downright irritating me lately.  Aside from practically moving the titular flesh-eaters to the background and becoming a sort of grimy soap opera (think Deliverance meets All My Children), the characters and storylines are really starting to grate on me.

I suppose my main complaint is that ever since Rick and company moved to Herschel’s farm, events have largely ground to a halt.  That would be bad enough, but now it also seems like the characters are running around acting like horror movie cliches, constantly trying to get out of bad situations resulting from their own boneheaded decisions.  If you don’t watch the show, you can skip over my list of complaints.  But if you happen to be a Dead Head, perhaps you should consider:

• After Shane puts down the zombie zoo living in Herschel’s barn, our erstwhile farmer decides it would be a good a time as any to fall off the wagon–by heading into town, which is infested with walkers.  This forces Rick and Glenn to go after him, and in the process  they run into a band of human marauders out for all that they can get, if you know what I mean.  A gun battle ensues, our heroes emerge triumphant, but the long and short of it is that there’s now a heavily armed group of nutcases out there with revenge on their minds.  Way to go, guys.
• When Rick doesn’t come back from town quickly enough, his wife Lori goes looking for him.  Alone.  No idea where she’s going, no idea how to find him, but off she goes–and wrecks her car in the process.  Not only is this monumentally stupid, it doesn’t say much for the writers’ view of women drivers.
• After rescuing Randall (who was with the aforementioned marauders) from Certain Death, Rick decides that they have to cut him loose in another town far away from the farm, so he and Shane set out to do just that.  They pick what looks like a quiet school bus depot to get the job done–and then get into a fight.  Fists fly, blood flows, and they end up breaking a window that releases a zombie horde upon them.  This leads to some admittedly cool badassery, but at this point I’m kind of rooting for the zombies.
• Later, in a righteous huff over the impending execution of Randall (why did they bother to rescue him again?), Dale storms out of the farmhouse to be alone with his thoughts.  After dark.  In the middle of a field.  With undead ghouls roaming all around.  By the time he stumbles across an eviscerated cow, we pretty much know what’s going to happen next.  Speaking of which, I have to ask why the zombie that was munching on said cow stopped what he was doing long enough to sneak up on Dale.  Was he out taking a leak?

Anyway, as you can see, one bad choice leads to another, and another, and another…  It’s like the daisy chain of events that sunk the Titanic, only more incompetent.  On the bright side, though, if the characters keep on going like this chances are pretty good that they’ll all get eaten and we’ll have to move on to another merry band of survivors.  But whatever happens, just make sure that Lauren Cohan stays.  She makes anything more watchable.

I’ll admit, it’s kind of weird when you realize one day that you’re living in the future.  Admittedly, it’s not exactly the future that some sci-fi auteurs envisioned (witness poor Stanley Kubrick and 2001–no Pan Am flights into space quite yet;  hell, there isn’t even a Pan Am anymore), but the technology is making things change at a pretty good clip.  Nowhere is this more true than in the world of media.  Think about what was strange and exotic only a few years ago–Netflix streaming, e-books, downloading a movie–and then think again about how much we now take these things for granted.  Your average teen probably doesn’t even know that buying music once meant a trip to the record store, or that Must See TV required you to plunk yourself down in front of the tube at the same time every week.  Nowadays, they’re all watching that stuff on their smartphones, in between tweets and Facebook pokes.

Of course, all of this revolutionary tech has got the content providers running around like a drunken man in a square house after being told to go pee in the corner.  Everything is moving so fast that they can barely keep up–and so it also goes with the publishing industry, which, like everyone else, is standing at the digital crossroads and wondering, “How do we make money off of this?”  I’m glad to see, though, that publishers are largely embracing the new reality, rather than going down the Hollywood path of trying to stuff the genie back into the bottle.  In fact, in the last few days we’ve seen Apple throw down a rather significant gauntlet in just this area, with their hard push into the textbook market and their release of some cool free tools that anyone can use to make content.  You can be sure that those of us who write fiction will also be hopping on this bandwagon.

So what does it all mean for traditional publishing?  Well, for one thing it means the rules have changed–assuming that there are still rules.  Anybody can be his own publisher.  Retailers are now content providers.  For those who still want paper copies, publishing on demand eliminates the cost of print runs.  The possibilities are endless.  To cite a recent example, the actor James Franco recently inked a deal to sell his first novel to Amazon.com.  My guess is that they probably gave him a better share of the royalties than he would have gotten from a “regular” publisher–because they can afford to!  With Amazon handling the acquisition, editing and distribution, they cut out the middlemen and keep the costs down, which means more profit for everyone–including the author.

My guess is that you’ll see this catch on more and more as time goes by.  Eventually, some brand-name writer–a Stephen King, a John Grisham, or even a (choke) Stephanie Meyer–will head in that direction, and inspire a lot of others to follow.  As for the rest of us mere mortals, I think that these big changes will lead to a lot more opportunity for newer voices to be heard.  It’s always been a huge risk to launch a new writer because of the considerable expense involved in printing and distribution;  but with digital distribution, that isn’t such a problem anymore.  If anything, these emerging technologies may well herald a new golden age in publishing.

Fall is getting closer–and it’s not just wishful thinking on my part.  One of the highlights was taking my daughter Lexie to her first college football game (Gators chomping down on UAB).  Well, technically it was my wife who took her to the actual game, as we only had two tickets;  yours truly spent the evening in a Gainesville movie theater watching The Smurfs 3D with my son Christian–and even that wasn’t half bad.  Still, we all got to bask in the electric thrill that is campus life in the fall, which really took me back to my own days at Texas A&M (was it really over twenty years ago?).  Even if you’re not a football fan, you gotta love it.

The fall seasonals have also been coming in fast and furious.  Keeping up with them all is as dirty a job as you can imagine, but I’ve been doing my best not to be derelict in my duty.  Here are a few more selections for you to peruse.

Shipyard Smashed Pumpkin

It was one of those things–you know, when you say to yourself over and over again that you’re not going to do it, but then you do it anyway?  Sigh.  At eight bucks a bottle, I thought this probably wasn’t worth the risk–but since my only experience with Imperial Pumpkin ales has been with Weyerbacher, I thought it important to expand my horizons a little.

For this kind of style, you’d think that the Smashed Pumpkin would come on pretty strong.  But I have to give ol’ Pugsley credit–in spite of that 9.0% abv, he’s crafted himself a subtle ale with hints of cinnamon and nutmeg, and dare I even suspect cloves?  The pumpkin doesn’t assert itself until the finish, which is nice and smooth without the slightest bitterness, nor any of the overt sweetness one would expect from such a heavy duty beer.  In short, it goes down easy–way too easy, in fact, which is why it’s a good thing that this is on the expensive side.  I could easily see this one turning into a habit.  There’s a reason fall only comes ’round once a year!

Tommyknocker Small Batch Pumpkin

Oh, those mischievous Tommyknockers!  I’m a big fan of Colorado beers in general, and this brewery makes one of my all-time faves, Jackwhacker Wheat Ale (which also has one of the best labels I’ve ever seen).  This is the first year that I’ve noticed the Small Batch Pumpkin, and it may even be the first year Tommyknocker has made this particular brew–and like their others, they put their own unique spin on a traditional style.  What’s the secret?  Believe it or not, molasses.

That’s right, molasses.  Not only does it impart a dark smoothness to the taste, it makes it rather fuller bodied without knocking you over with alcohol.  This is definitely one you drink for the flavors rather than a warming effect, much like a porter–though without the roastiness.  In all, a worthy effort that I would have again.  Definitely worth your while.

Boxcar Pumpkin Porter

Speaking of porters, this one struck me as a pretty unusual combo–so I figured what the heck.  No guts, no glory, right?  I have to admire anyone who tries to do something different with a pumpkin beer, though some fare better than others–and in this case the results were a bit mixed.  The Boxcar started off pretty promising, with a robust maltiness offset by the slight sweetness of pumpkin, but it seemed as though the hops they used to balance out the finish were a bit too bitter.  The aftertaste was a bit unpleasant, and only seemed to heighten after subsequent sips, especially as the beer warmed over the minutes in my glass.  My advice if you pick some up, although it might seem anathema to you dark beer lovers out there:  chill thoroughly and drink it down while it’s still very cold.

As promised, the sudsy adventures continue.  The nice part is that as the weeks go on, more and more seasonals are starting to appear on the shelves!  That also means that the summer ales are starting to go on clearance, so there are more temptations to distract me from my journey–but never fear, I will not be daunted!  Slightly detoured, perhaps, but not daunted.  In the meantime, here’s what made it into this weeks’ shopping cart:

Southern Tier Harvest Ale

I’ve been  trolling for Southern Tier’s Pumpking Ale, but so far haven’t found it at any of my local retailers.  This, however, popped up and looked like it might be a good way to tide myself over.  I’m happy to say it didn’t disappoint.  The Harvest Ale provides a nice balance between malt and hops–enough of the former to give it a slightly bigger taste, with enough of the latter for a smooth, clean finish.  You might call it a “bridge” beer between the lighter summer ales and the winter warmers.  Like a slightly off-color jest, it does its best not to offend while at the same time offering some worthwhile flavor.  It doesn’t boldly go where no beer has gone before, but it’s definitely worth a try!

Breckenridge Autumn Ale

This one caught my eye because I’ve a big fan of Breckenridge’s Vanilla Porter, and Colorado craft beers in general.  And like its marvelous vanilla cousin, the Autumn Ale reveals layers of complexity you might not expect.  It starts off on the mellow side, making you think that this might be a lightweight beer, until the malts kick in and finish off that first swallow like a gust of cool air from the first cold front of the season.  And trust me, if you haven’t lived in Florida you don’t know how welcome that gust can be.  Even so, I’d rate this as a highly sessionable beer–not too heavy on the ABV, but with bold enough flavors to keep things interesting.  I’d certainly buy this one again–and if you happen to find some in your neck of the woods, don’t hesitate to pick up a six pack.  As the label says, it goes pretty good after some rakin’!  Or bush trimmin’.  Or lawn mowin’.  Aw, shoot–maybe I should just get a yard service and watch while sippin’ on this.  Yeah, that sounds like just the ticket…